Peace, Salaam, Shalom! I am back in the East Bay for about a month now after spending some days in the New York area after my return from Israel/Palestine. For a quick refresher, I was with CODEPINK on a 40 person international delegation, attempting to deliver toys, school supplies, etc. to the children of Gaza. We set up camp near the border (about 30 minutes from the Erez crossing) at a fabulous ecological, totally sustainable farm called Adamama. Due to my own fear of bringing a computer, having been warned of possible confiscation upon arrival at the Ben Gurion airport in Tel Aviv, I decided to leave the laptop at home. Hence, the subsequent lack of blogging. However, when I did return to the states, I was so full of feeling that I found I could not write…or maybe I was just resisting it, I am not sure. The following entry is most likely going to be a journey within the journey.
These last four weeks of my life have been the happiest of my life and at once, have yielded some of the most provocative feelings and emotions I have felt. It is truly something to feel as though you are no longer participating in the dress rehearsal of life, but are instead part of something so much bigger than you, something you have wanted to participate in for a long time. The gratitude in that is immense, yet there is another component. Within this joy and this happiness of serving on a delegation so important and so necessary, is the very real sadness and heartbreak of the witness itself.
I wish I could write that it was not heartbreaking to stand in the starkness of the Erez Crossing, every day continuously attempting to deliver toys to the children of Gaza at the border, and repeatedly denied by the Israeli government. I wish I could write that my heart did not tear in helplessness as I stared at the fence with the sun broiling down, wondering how close the Gazans actually were, knowing we were not going to be allowed entry. I wish I could write that I sat without tears in my eyes, rolling down my face, when Elise Aghazarian-a young Palestinian woman who has always lived under the occupation- shared her dream to one day see Jaffa and the Mediterranean Sea. I wish I could write that I understand a world where walls and fences and gates need to be constructed around us for things to be "safe." But I can’t write this and I will never believe this. And for this I am thankful, because I know there is another way, a solution.
I can write about the power of nonviolence. I can write that even after witnessing the absolute despair of a seemingly hopeless situation, I am more hopeful than I have ever been. I can write that I had the great fortune of working with some of the most amazing activists, ranging in age from 20 to 70, and with varying levels of experience and backgrounds-from students to people like co-founder of CODEPINK Medea Benjamin and humanitarian clown Patch Adams. I can write that we made those Israeli guards at the crossing break down and laugh and smile with all the love we bestowed upon them, through our clowning around, donning big red clown noses. I can write that the people of Gaza knew we flew our kites in solidarity with them on the other side of the fence, the fence that separates them from us. We flew them high in the sky so that maybe, just maybe they would see them and know they were not alone. I can write that we wrote messages for the people of Gaza and tied them to the fence with flowers, while the guards looked on in disbelief, not knowing what to do. I can write that we danced and sang and laughed together at the border, building a playground, while the samba band played. I can write that we did not give up and we must still not give up.
Now, please do not misunderstand me, it was difficult. After all, in the end, they did not let us into Gaza. The items we brought, including the playground we hoped to bring to the children, were not allowed entry. Such items like pumpkins, sugar, concrete, paper, tea, chocolate, flour, coffee, etc. are all considered contraband and can be allowed/disallowed at the discretion of Israeli government. We had a strong sense we would not be allowed in, but that was not the point. The point was to try our hardest and moreover, expose the absurdity of the situation, all the while using nonviolence. The media picked up on our presence there and through our Ahava boycott protest (see link below), we gained attention from Israeli news.
Before I left I wondered exactly why I was going. I felt compelled to go, to witness, but was not completely sure why. Very early on in the journey it became clear. It was simple: it was what I was supposed to be doing and where I was supposed to be. The Israeli-Palestinian conflict has been "alive" for so long it seems as though the majority of the world has accepted it to always be this way. I am too stubborn to roll over and relinquish to this ideology, the idea of "this is how it is." I choose to subscribe to how things ought to be. I remember when the Berlin Wall came down and my mother told me to remember the moment, expressing I was witnessing history. I remember South Africa and apartheid and the boycotts of the 80s. I remember the photograph of the student in Tiananmen Square: this courageous act of nonviolence, a young man alone in front of a line of tanks-this changed my life. As I type out this cathartic entry, I steal glances of my poster revealing the unknown Tiananmen Square hero and remember Gandhi’s words, "When I despair, I remember that all through history the ways of truth and love have always won. There have been tyrants, murderers, and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall. Think of it-always." Yes, thank you God, I still believe in nonviolence and know the potentiality for transformation is always possible.
Peace and all good,
http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3727445,00.html
http://www.youtube.com/user/CWPAction
http://news.walla.co.il/?w=/1/1499704
www.flickr.com/groups/codepinkisraelgazadelegation/pool
http://www.bilin-ffj.org/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ann-wright/israeli-police-and-milita_b_215…
http://english.aljazeera.net/news/middleeast/2009/06/20096141740489764.html
p.s. more about the delegation next time…stay tuned…
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